"I Now Pronounce You...Single and Parenting"

Today, it seems the only constant thing in life is change. Our values have changed, along with our economics, technologies, and the way we view families. Different types of families are much more accepted today than they were 50 years ago. Families and marriage have always been institutions that people valued, yet our ideologies towards them are in transition. Marriage used to be the first step into adulthood. Today, it is the last. Additionally, there is a contradiction between the things we value. Although we respect marriage, we also treasure individualism. People jump into short-term relationships because they feel they will gain personal growth from it. It has been observed that in modern day society, it is common for people to have children in these unstable relationships. However, if an individual has children, other temporary relationships they have in the future can cause a lot of turbulence in the lives of their kids. In a world that is constantly changing, I feel that the best option is for parents to simply remain single, especially after the emotional strain of a divorce. With this, the child has some sense of stability in their lives and they have one less thing to adjust to. Parents have the responsibility of putting their child first and asking themselves: "When everything else in the world is changing, shouldn't my child, at the very least, experience invariability in their home?"

As a parent, one must consider the happiness of their child or teen and evaluate the harm it may cause them by bringing someone new into the picture. Stability is very important for a child's development. For this reason, parents should avoid rushing into relationships, marriages, or cohabiting relationships. Statistics show that almost two thirds of American marriages end in divorce. While some teens cope well with the termination of their parents' relationship, others experience repercussions such as behavioral difficulties at school, anger, low self-esteem, substance abuse problems and often don't accomplish as much as they potentially could in their careers. Divorced or single parents need to adhere to the idea of taking things slowly for the emotional health and stability of their children. Children observe adult relationships and usually apply what they have learned to their own relationships as adults. If a child is living with parents who are incessantly fighting, it creates an undesirable home environment for them and has a major impact on their future. Furthermore, a parent who is no longer devoting time to fighting with a partner may have more energy to give to their kids. Children desire love and devotion from their parents, but when the parent is focusing on their own romantic connections, the child can never understand permanence. Some people disdain the idea of single parent families because they feel it creates social imbalances. However, it is not the single parent families creating the problems, but it is the instability the parents are subjecting their children to. The persistent break-ups parents undergo not only affect them negatively, but their child or teen as well. Continuously bringing someone new into their home is teaching their child that it is acceptable to emulate that example in the future and it is detrimental for that child's emotional state. While parents are so wrapped up in their own erratic emotions, they fail to notice how unhappy their child is because they are not getting the love and attention that children require to grow. Parents need to put aside their personal satisfaction once a child in the picture because even if they don't want to, they have the duty of putting that child first. 

In conclusion, because family is the basic function of a society, it is important for it to remain stable. Single parents have more time to devote to their children and allow them to live in a well-balanced environment, thus maintaining that properly functioning community. In a world that has been changing for more than 20 years now, children need to know that not everything needs to change. Partnerless parents are able to teach their children this not only by remaining single, but also by showing their kid that their unconditional love and affection are feelings that will never, ever change.